Pool to be shutdown. Residents told to pay $75 per month for offsite gym pool
“Per Your Lease” (aka: ‘Aaaactuallllyyyyy…’)
"Per your lease"?? How about "PER THE LAW, BUDDY"
A Masterclass in Saying a Lot While Solving Nothing
You know the guy.
He leans in.
He smirks a little.
He inhales like he’s about to deliver a decisive blow.
And then:
“Aaaactuallllyyyyy…”
At The Fifty-Five Fifty, that guy has been fully institutionalized.
He doesn’t say “actually.”
He says:
“Per your lease.”
The Routine
You raise an issue.
Something is broken.
Something doesn’t add up.
Something clearly isn’t being handled the way it should be.
And right on cue:
“Per your lease…”
It lands with the confidence of a mic drop.
As if a 60-page boilerplate document just settled a real-world problem.
The Illusion of Authority
Let’s translate what’s really happening.
“Per your lease” is not a solution.
It’s a performance.
It’s a way of sounding definitive without actually engaging with the substance of the issue.
Different problem, same script:
- “Per your lease…”
- “Per your lease…”
- “Per your lease…”
At a certain point, it stops sounding authoritative and starts sounding automatic.
Aaaactuallllyyyyy… Here’s the Missing Part
A lease is a contract.
It is not above:
- The law
- Public policy
- Tenant protections
- Basic standards of fairness
If something conflicts with the law, the lease doesn’t win.
The law does.
So Let’s Even the Playing Field
If management gets a catchphrase, residents get one too:
“Per the law.”
“Per our rights.”
Short. Clear. Just as effective.
And Yes, Residents Can Speak Freely About Where They Live
Let’s address the unspoken assumption behind a lot of this.
Residents are absolutely allowed to:
- Share their experiences
- Describe conditions in the building
- Express their opinions about management
- Tell others what it is actually like to live here
That includes saying, in plain terms, whether they would or would not recommend living here based on their own experience.
That’s not a lease issue.
That’s a core right.
No amount of “per your lease” changes that.
This Is What People Actually Respond To
Prospective residents don’t read leases first.
They talk to current residents.
They read reviews.
They look for patterns.
And what they hear is shaped by real experiences, not boilerplate language.
Bottom Line
“Per your lease” is supposed to end the conversation.
It doesn’t.
It just reveals that someone would rather point to paper than fix a problem.
So the next time you hear:
“Per your lease…”
Feel free to respond:
“Per the law.”
“Per our rights.”
“Aaaactuallllyyyyy… let’s talk about what’s actually happening.”
Because the “Aaaactuallllyyyyy…” routine only works if everyone else goes quiet.
And that’s clearly not happening.
Tell 'Em to Follow the Law
Since they seem to like rules so much, how about FOLLOWING THE LAW.
The law will always beat your "lease". Tell management and ownership to follow the LAW and respect our RIGHTS.